Canada jokes

I've stumbled upon this on someone's blog last year and thought it was very fun so I copied the joke on my computer. Now I don't know where I found it anymore, but I'll share with you anyway. I can't relate to all, but some are just right on!


Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about Canadians:

• If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May, you may live in Canada.
  (huh, didn't get this one, not where I lived)
  
• If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you may live in Canada.
• If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Canada.
  (oh yes, definitely...and you might be having the barbecue on in the snow)
  
• If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialled a wrong number, you may live in Canada.
• If 'Vacation' means going anywhere south of Detroit for the weekend, you may live in Canada.
• If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Canada.
  (yes!!!)
  
• If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Canada.
  (of course, if someone had an accident you do assume it's been a road kill, right?)
  
• If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C' in the same day, and back again, you may live in Canada.
  (yeah for the Chinook)
  
• If you can drive 90 km/hr through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you may live in Canada.
• If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Canada.
  (and the car keys are under the passengers tire!)
  
• If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Canada.
• If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you may live in Canada.
  (hehehe)
  
• If the speed limit on the highway is 80 km -- You're going 95 and everybody is passing you, you may live in Canada.
  (huh...not in BC though)
  
• If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you may live in Canada.
  (and some rivers can be used as road now)
  
• If you know all 4 seasons: Almost winter, winter, still winter, and road construction, you may live in Canada.
  
• If you have more miles on your snow blower than your car, you may live in Canada.
• If you find -2 degrees 'a little chilly', you may live in Canada.
  (yep yep yep)
  
• If you actually understand these jokes, and forward them to all your friends, you definitely are Canadian, and proud to be.
  (ok...almost then)