Canada jokes

I've stumbled upon this on someone's blog last year and thought it was very fun so I copied the joke on my computer. Now I don't know where I found it anymore, but I'll share with you anyway. I can't relate to all, but some are just right on!

Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about Canadians:

  • If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May, you may live in Canada.
    (huh, didn't get this one, not where I lived)
  • If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you may live in Canada.
  • If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Canada.
    (oh yes, definitely...and you might be having the barbecue on in the snow)
  • If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialled a wrong number, you may live in Canada.
  • If 'Vacation' means going anywhere south of Detroit for the weekend, you may live in Canada.
  • If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Canada.
  • If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Canada.
    (of course, if someone had an accident you do assume it's been a road kill, right?)
  • If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C' in the same day, and back again, you may live in Canada.
    (yeah for the Chinook)
  • If you can drive 90 km/hr through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you may live in Canada.
  • If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Canada.
    (and the car keys are under the passengers tire!)
  • If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Canada.
  • If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you may live in Canada.
  • If the speed limit on the highway is 80 km -- You're going 95 and everybody is passing you, you may live in Canada.
    (huh...not in BC though)
  • If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you may live in Canada.
    (and some rivers can be used as road now)
  • If you know all 4 seasons: Almost winter, winter, still winter, and road construction, you may live in Canada.
  • If you have more miles on your snow blower than your car, you may live in Canada.
  • If you find -2 degrees 'a little chilly', you may live in Canada.
    (yep yep yep)
  • If you actually understand these jokes, and forward them to all your friends, you definitely are Canadian, and proud to be.
    (ok...almost then)


Poetikat said…
As a Canadian, I can totally relate to every single one of these. This was a really good laugh, Goofball! Thanks!

I'm going to borrow it and put it on Facebook.

Hey! Are you on Facebook? Have I asked you that before?

Virtualsprite said…
These are funny... and they all work for Wisconsin, too!
rozebril said…
Spijtig genoeg alleen de zomer meegemaakt daar. Wel grappig!
R. Duckie said…
Some of those are pretty funny - but never having known a snowy winter I can't relate to half of it! The DQ down the road is still open. And I thought Home Depot was an American store? Here it's Home Hardware, and Canadian Tire :) Deer - Yes Jumper Cables - Definitely Yes!
R. Duckie said…
yes, are you on Facebook? :)
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